Lanthanum
by deletednobody
Summary: ReidOC one-shot. Calm in the eye of the storm.


**Disclaimer: **I don't own Criminal Minds, its characters or all related logos and trademarks, et cetera. I own the characters I made up and most of the plot, if not all. If you find any plot parts you recognize from the Criminal Minds TV show, then those parts are not mine either. The events mentioned here that happened in a real area are not real either and any similarities in this story with real life is a coincidence.

**Song Lyrics: **Although it's only four words of the chorus of the song, just look it up: Dark Blue by Jack's Mannequin. That's where the lyrics came from. Listen to it. It's freaking awesome.

**Author's Note: **I decided that it was unfair to just delete my Reid story without any explanation or apology. I just don't feel that up to it, and I may consider re-writing it... And so, for the apology:

Lanthanum

_by The Last Llama_

For some reason, rooftops always comforted Therell. Maybe it was the feeling that everything else below you was so small, that you were bigger than them and could crush them. But Therell didn't want the power (what would she do with the power anyway?); she just wanted the safety of freedom. The cold wind blowing her hair in different directions, the view of the sky.

That's why, when Spencer Reid found his apartment empty, the roof of the building was the first place he checked. She was there, facing the setting sun in an obnoxious orange poncho and faded rainbow pajamas, barefoot.

"York?" he asked tentatively. She made no sign to indicate she heard him, so he walked to the spot beside her. Before he did, though, she spoke.

"Dark blue, dark blue..." she sang. As contradictory as it sounded, since the sky was still a dazzling mix of purple, orange, golden yellow, and pink, it had the same wondrous tone she talked with.

"Did you know the sky's only like that because of pollution?" she mumbled. "That the beauty you see is only the flaw?" she beckoned him to come closer, and took hold of his wrist.

"I-- I wasn't aware of that." he stuttered. She was deep in thought. Sad, in a way but peaceful.

"Beauty in the eye of the beholder." she said, her words more firm than the last few that seemed like wisps of smoke.

Suddenly, as if someone pressed an 'on' button, she galloped around.

"Behold the world!" she yelled, spreading her arms out to emphasize her point. She galloped around the edge of the roof, slightly terrifying Reid with the image of her falling, but she never tripped once. Her arms were still spread out, almost like trying to grab what was in front of her and never let go. When she returned to the spot she was originally standing in, she ran up to Reid.

"Can you see the beauty?" she whispered breathlessly to his face. His eyes wandered around to take in the moment as she looked up expectantly at him. Then he looked at her.

"Yes, I believe I can."

His eyes never left her. She beamed at him, but viewed it as completely platonic; that's what Therell was. Completely platonic, even more so than Reid.

"It might be a beautiful world, Spence, but it's also a sad one. You of all people know why."

Sometimes he hated it when she was like this... So nostalgic, so far away. But it seemed to give her depth, and make her more knowledgeable. She was smarter than him, but she never knew it.

"It's sad because I'm on it..." he mumbled quietly. "And beautiful because you're on it."

"What did you say?" she was still very happy. Spencer liked to think it was because of him, but then that wasn't true, was it?

"You're right."

"No one's right."

"You're no one?" he tried feebly. Therell liked to twist and turns words all the time, just to have a mini 'smart debate' as she called it.

"I think so."

Once again, she gave no definite answer, and started pacing about.

"I've been kind of thinking about today, about emotions."

"Huh?"

"They're all just chemical reactions, right?"

"Neurologically... But you can't pin something abstract down, like love." he chuckled at the thought. How many times had writers-- artists in general –tried to capture the essence of love? They always got it wrong; even Shakespeare did.

"Do you know what love is, doctor?" she passed by him and took his hand, leading him around the rooftop to pace with her. Then she took his other hand in hers and started to lead him in an awkward cross between a waltz and nonsense. He blushed. If anyone in the team saw him, they'd have a laughing fit.

"I think... I think so."

"You sound unsure."

"My idea might be wrong."

"How can your idea be wrong if nobody's sure what the right one is?" she laughed. They stopped dancing.

"No one's right." he mocked her.

"You're no one?" she teased back.

"I guess." he replied, shrugging his shoulders. A flash of anger pulsed through her veins.

"Don't say that, Spence. No matter what anyone else says, _don't say that. _No matter how small you feel in the world, don't. It's not true. You are someone."

"To who?" Why was she feeling protective all of a sudden? It wasn't fair. As recluses went, Therell was by far the most eccentric. Approachable, constantly smiling, somewhat naive... Although she was distant when it came to friends and relations. She kept pushing him away; he was fine with just friends (okay, it was maybe kinda sorta killing him in the inside, but he could handle it, couldn't he?) if she just stopped pulling him and pushing him away like the freaking tide waves

"To the team. To the people whose lives you've saved. To yourself." But never to her, huh? Never to her.

"How about to you?" he asked meekly. He'd never be someone-- anyone, whatever –if he was nobody to her.

"I s'pose so."

"I need a solid answer."

"I don't give those out, I'm sorry. Take a number and come back tomorrow."

"Stop being so sarcastic."

"Stop caring that I'm so."

"I try."

"Try harder."

"God, you're bipolar!"

"What?"

"One minute you're so happy and then next you get all cynical on me. Haven't you noticed?"

"Well, yeah, I've been doing that on purpose. People tend to notice things they do on purpose."

"Of course people notice things they do consciously, that's just-- wait, what?"

"I'm bipolar on purpose."

"That's impossible."

"I'm impossible."

"How can you play with your feelings like that?"

"How can you?"

Ah. The three words that left Reid dumbfounded. Pity they weren't 'I love you'. Anyway, it wasn't important.

"What?" he uttered again.

"You're an idiot, you know that?" Therell was one of the few people who freely called him that.

Then it was like everything was in a movie. The sounds he heard were distorted by the amplifiers in his brain, the picture he was seeing through his eyes was a bit grainy and surreal. She was there, right in front of him, and she walked closer and closer...

"I've been kind of thinking about emotions today."

"Yeah?"

"So this is love," she whispered fondly against his lips.

* * *

**End apology. It took me two days to write that. Sorry if it seems a bit AWOL, but then I think I like it! Ha ha. I just realized I'm never good at stories and one-shots are my best bets. Hope you liked it. Please review.  
**


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